Saturday, 9 September 2017

The Question

I started 6th grade with a gigantic fear of asking questions. My math teacher, the one responsible for making me hate numbers and functions for the rest of my school years and probably my life, was an old woman who absolutely despised being asked questions of any kind. I had always been a very inquisitive kid and I felt comfortable asking questions to anyone, but that woman was the first person who not only laughed at my ignorance, but also the one who made sure I stayed that way in regards to the subject she taught. My parents found me a tutor eventually and I was able to pass her class.

After two years of being her student, the only thing that terrified me more than math was asking questions; I couldn't do it to save my own life, and it didn't matter how nice or approachable most of my teachers were. I ended up finding ways of discovering the answers that I needed, which usually meant reading the whole book or doing some research online. When I started high school I was confident of my abilities and passionate about the subjects I had to study, which helped me get back to my inquisitive self.

Now I ask specific questions to my hairdresser, to my dentist or to the lady who sells newspapers downtown. Most of the times, my question is not about me or my personal concerns; I'm just curious and I like to learn. How many bottles of shampoo do you order per month? Who makes that shampoo? Why did you become a dentist? And people usually love to answer these questions. It's the best way to make a connection, to get to know each other, to talk about different interests and passions. But for some reason, most people are still scared of enquiring. And maybe that's because we're getting used to the don't-ask-don't-answer policy: the most comfortable, ignorant way of living life.

Nowadays, and specially online, people feel more and more threatened when someone questions their ideas and beliefs. There are respectable and insulting ways of asking questions for sure, but I feel like we don't even bother to distinguish them anymore. A question has automatically become an insult, and this is a very dangerous state of mind: we deny ourselves a chance to teach, to learn, to connect and to evolve. We need to keep in mind that having our ideas questioned is not a threat, it's healthy; because sometimes they just stand there, like those clothes we don't wear anymore but still own, and we need someone to come to us and ask "you never wear those anymore, do you?". That way we can either give them away, or realize that they still fit.

As poet Vasudev said somewhere, "The sign of intelligence is that you are constantly wondering. Idiots are always dead sure about every damn thing they are doing in their life". I had to repeat this to myself for years until I realized that asking, wondering, is not a sign of stupidity or weakness; it's a sign of curiosity and growth. I owe it to my eleven year old self to make sure that all my questions are heard, and to answer other people's in the best way that I can. Because that old teacher, without even knowing and definitely unintentionally, gave me the answer to a much greater question: thanks to her, I knew what kind of person I wanted to be. Someone who definitely doesn't have all the answers, but is unafraid of sharing them with the world.

Friday, 1 September 2017

6 Things on My Fall Wishlist

Fall is my favorite season when it comes to personal style: not only it is easier to buy durable, good quality pieces, but the designs tend to be more classic and timeless at this time of the year as well. As opposed to my temperamental summer style, during colder seasons I find it easier to achieve sobriety, maturity and make smarter choices overall. Celebrating the 1st of September and keeping my Fall staples in mind, here's my wishlist for the season.
I tried on a black vinyl trench coat last year and my only regret is not bringing it home. I wasn't sure I could style it at the time, but I'm definitely on the hunt for one now. How I'd style it: With a vibrant colored turtleneck (mustard yellow would be awesome), a cool pair of jeans, funky little heels and a sleek pair of sunglasses. There's this one from Mango.
There is not a big, relevant reason for me to buy a striped button down; it's classy, office appropriate and incredibly versatile. How I'd style it: with a pair of white, wide leg trousers, my faux fur leopard coat and shiny red ankle boots. There's this one from Zara.
Even though I'm not a big hat person, I've been seeing many cool looks with this kind of beret and I really want to give them a try. How I'd style it: I'm pretty sure they look great with everything! There's this one from ASOS.
Blazers are one of my biggest obsessions and after buying a pinstriped one last year, a slightly oversized checked blazer is my next purchase. How I'd style it: the styling in the picture above is perfect, but a nice alternative would be a black turtleneck, a black A line miniskirt and a pair of knee high boots. There's this one from Zara.
And speaking of, a black turtleneck is something I need to buy as soon as possible; it gives any outfit an instant update, it keeps me warm and looks great with absolutely everything. How I'd style it: with a grey pantsuit, a long camel overcoat, pointy kitten heels and a sleek low ponytail. There's this one from Mango.
I'm done with skinny jeans, but I haven't found a flattering pair of wide leg trousers yet. I want them bright colored and super high waisted. How I'd style them: besides a black turtleneck? I'd wear them with a sheer black blouse, the tartan blazer I mentioned and silver ankle boots. There's this pair from ASOS.